Do all blogs have a life span? I wonder this as my zest for writing here ebbs and flows. I wonder if Feet On The Ground has run it's course, and if I am too content to be bothered to write anything much, or with the same urgency.
This year has been a year of things not going as I expected but actually going better than I could ever have hoped. We planned to move, and now I am feeling settled again and the wanderlust wind has blown over, leaving behind a calm that's been really enjoyable. I've found a kind of contentedness and peace I haven't had for a long time. Our home has a kind of more grounded rhythm that has organically emerged out of the unsettledness, the itchy feet, the urge to wander. Like a ghost laid to rest. Part of it is of course, the babe. Grounding us all, the baby is perhaps a much needed anchor to stop all our flitting and flightiness.
Since we came back from France, Pete has been enjoying just being. Being a house husband and dad and not having some big project to have to strive towards. Rediscovering a playfulness he had perhaps lost touch with. Like the pleasure of painting till 2 in the morning. Or making fudge. Or reading comics. Really unwinding. Our friends perhaps think we're mad, 'dropping out' of the rat race for a while. Maybe we are. But maybe it's even madder to stay in it and get ill in the process?
How long will this playful period last? Who knows? We don't have an infinite amount of money in our pot, and in time, some income will need to be generated again for the future. Organically, new projects and jobs will emerge - when we are all ready. But for now, we're spending our kids precious childhood just enjoying seeing them unfold as people, being close to them, being playful with them and enjoying them before they're all grown up and all being independent. I can't imagine any single job more rewarding than that right now.
My birth planner feels as if it needs longer to cook, like a baby that hasn't yet reached its gestational age to be born, and allowing myself the freedom not to rush to publish it as it is now has been quite a relief. I read a quote somewhere from an author that said such and such book took them 7 years to write or something like that, and it was a really big moment for me to know that I should publish the book when it feels ready and not before!
All things have their natural time and rhythm and perhaps this blog has reached the end of its road.
It feels like perhaps this baby is slowing us all down and preparing us all for the chnge of pace, re-focusing us all on what is important in the here and now, giving us permission to just be and to just enjoy the simple things instead of trying to do big stuff. Right now, it's what we all need.
And when we're good n ready we'll kick some writing and computing ass and be ready and up for the intense rush of being so outward facing again. For now, we're turning inwards and bloody loving it.
Gently letting go of Feet On The Ground and channeling all my magic into home life, and loving my peeps. Adios for now and big love to you all.
Xx MF xX
Wednesday, 23 October 2013
Monday, 7 October 2013
To thy own heart to true!
Now we have been home for a week, and our feet are back on the ground, I've had time to absorb our trip away. Our latest travels have highlighted how much I truly treasure the freedom that we have and to hold onto it very dearly, and to live and love life more unapologetically on our own terms.
In terms of the trip itself, although our last journey to France and Spain was fun, travelling this time round was a much more liberating and easygoing experience. The weather was so much kinder. We did not share our bus with mozzies, ants, or nits. This time rather than doing most of the talking, the whole family spoke French to various degrees, with greater ease and less self-consciousness. We knew the bus more intimately, and she didn't break down on us! This time, we did more of our own cooking because we had our gas cooker. We had a new solar panel which helped charge batteries in between hook-ups. We were outdoors more often and did more active sporty things, and we ate pretty well. It felt like we really got into our groove for the whole trip, and enjoyed every place we stayed in, without exception. Winging it for a month felt less intimidating and daunting than trying to figure out where to be and what to do for 9 weeks. So we've learnt a lot from this trip. Each time we go away, we learn so many different things about ourselves, each other, about life.
One thing that truly struck me whilst I was away is how far we've all come in the last year, in our own different ways, both visibly and invisibly.
For my own part, I realise just how much less I care about conforming to any set of ideals or any group of people's ideas. Whether that's within society at general, or amongst my peer group, or wider circle of friends, or within the doula or birthing community or as a home educator. The need for others approval, or permission or whatever, to be exactly who I am, unapologetically and unashamedly. There is a so much judgement around about how to do everything the 'right' way, even within the supposedly most liberated of camps. And whilst I was away, I took a deep breath and I let it all go. I let go of even trying to live according to anyone else's vision or definitions of how to do things. I felt to my core, the total liberation of being unapologetically true to myself, to my family's needs, and wants and personalities. Without exception. Without checking first with anyone if that's ok. And truly respecting others to do the same. To really not give a crap about others choices. To not feel offended or annoyed by them, to feel the need to change them, or the world. So many forums and online places and discussions are full of people lamenting about others choices - all that time and precious energy wasted on wanting or needing others to be just like you, think just like you and act just like you! It's actually pretty crazy!!!
I feel a real sense of peace and liberation to really own this truth.
Travel wide my friends, travel wide!
"Be yourself. Everyone else is taken" ~ Oscar Wilde
In terms of the trip itself, although our last journey to France and Spain was fun, travelling this time round was a much more liberating and easygoing experience. The weather was so much kinder. We did not share our bus with mozzies, ants, or nits. This time rather than doing most of the talking, the whole family spoke French to various degrees, with greater ease and less self-consciousness. We knew the bus more intimately, and she didn't break down on us! This time, we did more of our own cooking because we had our gas cooker. We had a new solar panel which helped charge batteries in between hook-ups. We were outdoors more often and did more active sporty things, and we ate pretty well. It felt like we really got into our groove for the whole trip, and enjoyed every place we stayed in, without exception. Winging it for a month felt less intimidating and daunting than trying to figure out where to be and what to do for 9 weeks. So we've learnt a lot from this trip. Each time we go away, we learn so many different things about ourselves, each other, about life.
One thing that truly struck me whilst I was away is how far we've all come in the last year, in our own different ways, both visibly and invisibly.
For my own part, I realise just how much less I care about conforming to any set of ideals or any group of people's ideas. Whether that's within society at general, or amongst my peer group, or wider circle of friends, or within the doula or birthing community or as a home educator. The need for others approval, or permission or whatever, to be exactly who I am, unapologetically and unashamedly. There is a so much judgement around about how to do everything the 'right' way, even within the supposedly most liberated of camps. And whilst I was away, I took a deep breath and I let it all go. I let go of even trying to live according to anyone else's vision or definitions of how to do things. I felt to my core, the total liberation of being unapologetically true to myself, to my family's needs, and wants and personalities. Without exception. Without checking first with anyone if that's ok. And truly respecting others to do the same. To really not give a crap about others choices. To not feel offended or annoyed by them, to feel the need to change them, or the world. So many forums and online places and discussions are full of people lamenting about others choices - all that time and precious energy wasted on wanting or needing others to be just like you, think just like you and act just like you! It's actually pretty crazy!!!
I feel a real sense of peace and liberation to really own this truth.
Travel wide my friends, travel wide!
"Be yourself. Everyone else is taken" ~ Oscar Wilde
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